All of us have to deal with difficult people and distressing situations on a daily basis. Conflict is inevitable in life …but how do you settle a conflict amicably and reach an understanding that is to the benefit of all? It’s not always easy- but with these tips, you can keep the peace without ruffling too many feathers!
Stay calm. As the old adage goes, it pays to count to ten before you respond to any situation— especially one which is making you angry. Words spoken in anger often have the opposite effect of what was intended. Let the storm pass by, and do not respond in anger to any provocation.
Listen. You need to hear the other person’s point of view, without being judgmental. You may be surprised at how often others make sense, too! If you try to put yourself in another person’s shoes, you can understand where they are coming from and act with compassion.
Open up a communication channel. Quite often people just want to be heard. Once they are done talking, you can say what you have to say. Make sure they know that you are listening and are open to discussion.
Avoid passing the buck. Never try to blame someone else for the situation. If you are in the wrong, admit it. Owning up to a mistake doesn’t make you small…everyone makes mistakes, and you cannot be right all the time.
Work toward finding a solution. When you are in a calm place, you can assess the problem and reach an amicable solution. While it may not be possible to please everyone, you can negotiate and make sure that the solution helps you to move forward.
Shake hands and make up! Sleeping on a problem only makes it worse. Use some humour to defuse the situation once the problem is resolved, and ensure that you make up with everyone concerned! Make sure any conflict is resolved as quickly as possible, before it gets a chance to fester and grow out of all proportion.
You may need to relearn old behaviour and turn over a new leaf. Conflict management takes immense patience and some practice…however when we put in conscious effort to change our ways, we can keep the peace and lead a happier life!
